Licking Yogurt Lids, Calling Stores for Help, Running Out of Dining Chairs, and More

Nick: Hey, everybody. It's Nick Leighton.

Leah: And it's Leah Bonnema.

Nick: And we got so many great questions from you all in the wilderness ...

Leah: [howls]

Nick: That we have a bonus episode. So here we go. Our first question is quote, "Is it ever appropriate to lick a yogurt lid or the top of a cup with a lid or a spoon? Basically, should tongues be in public? Ha ha! But seriously."

Leah: I love the line, "Should tongues be in public?"

Nick: [laughs] I mean, I think it's a great question. So Leah, I feel like I know where you probably stand on this.

Leah: Yep. You do. You absolutely know where I stand on this.

Nick: But I want to just hear it from you just in case I'm wrong.

Leah: I was going to write a formal answer to this because I feel like I'm gonna get a lot of letters. But then I decided why would the way I deliver my information be in direct opposition to the message I'm delivering, which is quite informal?

Nick: [laughs] Okay.

Leah: This is how I feel.

Nick: Sure.

Leah: Here we go.

Nick: I'm ready.

Leah: I think we all know I'm fine with you licking your lid.

Nick: Yeah. Yeah, I feel like Leah Bonnema? Lick away.

Leah: Because I don't think you're getting a lid—a yogurt lid at the Ritz, you know what I mean?

Nick: Oh, I see. Okay, so if we were at 11 Madison, we are not gonna be served some FAGE yogurt in the container.

Leah: In the container. I feel like they're gonna take it out. Also, I understand, like, we all learn where the forks are so we don't take other people's forks. This is my yogurt lid. If the company that I am with is so—their world is so rocked, and they are so appalled by me licking a lid, that's—that's out of my hands.

Nick: [laughs]

Leah: You know, maybe shake your world up a little bit if what you live for is licking a yogurt lid, if it makes your day ...

Nick: Oh, are there those people?

Leah: Oh, yeah.

Nick: Is this something that is day making?

Leah: There are some people, I think, that love to lick a lid. They love to lick a spoon. They want that last bit. And if that brings you joy, I say lick away.

Nick: Okay. I mean, I think that is a reasonable conclusion based on the logic that you are using. [laughs]

Leah: I love how that was slightly judgmental. "The logic that you are using, Leah."

Nick: Well, when one's logic arrives at a certain conclusion ...

Leah: I wouldn't say that was actually logic. I would say that's more of a ...

Nick: It's a belief system.

Leah: It's a belief system.

Nick: [laughs] I feel like in general, table manners is about pretending that we're not eating. Like, so much of our table manners in the United States is this idea, like, "Oh, let's just, like, pretend that I'm not actually doing this bodily function and just shoving food in my face." So that's why we have all the sort of pageantry to sort of minimize that vibe. And does it make sense? Is it logical? You know, I don't make the rules. I'm just letting you know this is why we use spoons and not our hands. And so I think the licking does sort of convey more of a, "Oh, I am consuming food in front of you" in a more overt way. And I think because of that, it does feel a little provocative, a little outside the bounds, a little bit. Definitely an edge case.

Leah: I get what you're saying.

Nick: Yeah.

Leah: And I understand that it's a little provocative, but I think ...

Nick: Right. Well, you're a little provocative. [laughs]

Leah: I think it's okay to be a little provocative. If honestly, licking the yogurt lid is what sets the world on fire ...

Nick: Yes. I mean, I feel like in the spectrum of etiquette crimes, this is not being a no show for your best friend's wedding. Right. This is just we're licking the yogurt lid.

Leah: Also, and sometimes being appropriate all the time? Mmm ...

Nick: Okay. Well, I can't engage on that. I can't—I'm not going there.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: [laughs] The other thought I did have, though, is that there are different degrees of licking. And so, like, there's the ice cream cone. Like, that's a licking style.

Leah: I was thinking of the ice cream cone.

Nick: There is a place for that. There is, like, licking your fingers after eating barbecue chicken wings at a picnic. Like, that's—that's sort of a world in which we might live in. But it does feel like yogurt lid, I mean, because we're probably—where are we? When is this yogurt happening? Am I eating with somebody? Am I alone?

Leah: They just said—our letter-writer said "in public." You could be totally alone and still in public.

Nick: Well, okay. I feel like if I'm enjoying a yogurt in my bubble world on a park bench, and I am solo but there are people around potentially observing me, I feel like yogurt lid licking? Okay. All right. I mean, all right, fine. I feel like if I'm dining with you ...

Leah: With me.

Nick: The generic you.

Leah: Okay.

Nick: Not you, Leah.

Leah: Because if you're dining with me, Leah Bonnema ...

Nick: All bets are off.

Leah: Then you can just enjoy yourself and live the life you want to live.

Nick: That's also true. [laughs] Right. And then with other people, it's less enjoyable, that is true. But I feel like if I'm dining with somebody, and I'm being served a whole yogurt with lid, like aT A hotel breakfast buffet, this is actually very common where they, like, have all the yogurts and then, like, you just take one back to your table. And I'm dining with somebody else, I guess the question is: who am I dining with and what is our licking relationship? Maybe that's the question. Do I have a licking relationship with the client? With my boss? With a grandparent? Is this a best friend? Is this a spouse? Who am I licking in front of? And maybe that's the question at the end of the day.

Leah: I think that is the question.

Nick: So we can't answer that question because it just depends.

Leah: But the question was actually, "Should tongues be in public?" And I say if I have to say yes or no? Yes. But I think there's people that I probably wouldn't lick my plate in front of.

Nick: Okay. Even Leah Bonnema has some restraint sometimes.

Leah: Would I drag my fork across it and lick that fork? Maybe.

Nick: [laughs] Okay. Now Miss Manners has actually weighed in on something similar. And I just want to read you this question and the response, but I don't know if we want to have any commentary about it. I'm just gonna read it, though.

Leah: I mean, now that you've told me that we don't know if we want to have commentary about it, I will have commentary about it. So ...

Nick: So here's the question. Quote, "My husband and I had a wonderful coffee brandy drink in a restaurant recently. The rims of the glasses were frosted with sugar, which looked delicious. Would it have been proper for us to taste the sugar?" And Miss Manners says, "Miss Manners can hardly imagine anything that would do more for an evening—or a marriage—than for a wife and husband to sit opposite, looking at each other while silently licking the rims of fine glasses."

Leah: I stand corrected, I think I need to not add anything else.

Nick: Nope. I don't think we will add anything to that other than to say, licking? It's complicated. It's complicated. So our next question is quote, "I recently went to a chain home improvement store about two and a half hours after it opened, and stood at the paint counter waiting for help for so long I finally got out my cell phone, called the store, and politely asked if the paint counter was open. 'Oh, I'm sure it is,' the woman who answered the phone said. 'I see a customer standing there.' 'That would be me,' I explained. 'I've been here for a while, and there is no one here to help me.' She assured me she'd find someone to help me, got off the phone, found an employee, and I heard her say, 'Could you help at paint? That woman called.' Was it rude of me to call the store? I would have left the paint counter to search for an employee to ask for help, but I've shopped the paint counter at this time of day on multiple occasions, and I knew it could get busy very quickly, so I didn't want to leave, find someone, then have them immediately start serving whoever was first in whatever line might have formed in my absence. Nor did I want to have to explain to whatever line may have formed that I actually had been there for quite a while before they were, and had only left to get help, so I wasn't actually cutting. Calling just seemed like the best option. Was it rude?"

Leah: I think the only way it would have been rude is if you were rude on the phone, which you clearly were not.

Nick: Yeah, I think if the tone wasn't like, "I've been here for, like, two hours and no one's here," yeah, I feel like if it's just like, "Hey, is the paint counter open?" Yeah, I think this was the right move.

Leah: Yeah, I think it was totally the right move. You only brought up that that was you in line because the person said, "Oh, it must be. I see somebody." And you're like, "Oh no, that's me."

Nick: But I guess the question is when the employee you spoke with, like, found someone and was like, "That woman called," was she calling you out for calling? And, like, "That woman called us. Like, oh, isn't that person rude?" Or was that employee calling out the person who should have been at their station and be like, "You weren't at your station. That woman called." And so I guess the question is, who was that directed to?

Leah: Yeah, I think it was more of the second one. I actually don't think they were talking about our letter-writer. I think they were saying, "Hey, we have a person calling. Can you get over there?"

Nick: Although I don't know if that detail was necessary. It's just like, "Oh, there's someone at the paint counter who needs help. Can you assist them?" Like, that would have been fine. I don't think the detail of, like, oh, they called was probably necessary because then that taints the entire interaction, which is like, oh, now I have to go help this person who had to call.

Leah: I mean, why do people do things? We don't know.

Nick: That's true, yeah. Who could say? Who could say?

Leah: Maybe that was just their way of being like, you know ...

Nick: There's some urgency.

Leah: There's some urgency. If you could, you know, two shakes of a lamb's tail, get over there.

Nick: But would you have called? I feel like this would have been tricky for you. Like, you would have just stood there forever.

Leah: No, I would have gone and got somebody. I wouldn't have thought of calling. I don't know if our listeners know this. I'm not a phone call person.

Nick: Right. If you could have texted the store, then ...

Leah: Yeah, I'll call—I'll call when it's like a conversation, like, with a friend, otherwise I'm not a caller. I would prefer some other form of, like, a face to face or a text, so I just wouldn't think of it.

Nick: Yeah, calling would not have occurred to me because, like, any time I've ever called a store to try and get help, like, it's never been helpful.

Leah: It's never been helpful.

Nick: Like a big box store like this is like you're not gonna get to anybody, like, or the right person. Like, that's maddening. It's probably easier to just, like, look for somebody. And actually, if you look for somebody and found them, then you drag them back there with you, and then therefore you are customer number one unless a different employee also arrived while you were gone. I guess that's the risk.

Leah: The only other option is to stand there and sort of howl or yell for paint help without moving, which seems provocative.

Nick: Well, this is when you have to bring your own bell.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: This—this is that time when bringing your own bell actually could come in handy. You just take the bell out of the bag, put it on the counter and start hitting it.

Leah: I did think, "Too bad they didn't have a bell."

Nick: [laughs]

Leah: I was gonna say—speaking of provocative, I just want to say in typical Leah fashion, back to the last question ...

Nick: Uh-huh?

Leah: I just feel like it's important to add I'm not a yogurt lid licker.

Nick: Okay. Just out of principle, or we just don't do dairy? Like, what are we—what about this are we not doing?

Leah: I don't lick yogurt lids. I would put my spoon on it to get that extra part. It's just not something I do. I just felt the need to because I think you think I'm a yogurt lid licker.

Nick: I do think that. Yes.

Leah: And I'm not. I have no interest in licking yogurt lids.

Nick: Oh!

Leah: This has nothing to do with me. I'm doing this for the people who deeply enjoy licking yogurt lids.

Nick: I am surprised to hear this. This is news, because I do feel like you would be a yogurt lid licker.

Leah: I'm just not at all.

Nick: And why is that?

Leah: I have no interest in licking yogurt lids.

Nick: Okay, interesting. So you use a spoon. Twist!

Leah: It is a twist.

Nick: It is a twist.

Leah: I was sitting here thinking, "Oh, Nick thinks I'm doing this for me. I'm doing it for the yogurt lid lickers out there."

Nick: Wow! Oh, you're so generous, Leah.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: [laughs] Okay. Well, thank you for correcting me because I was going to go through the day—or my life—thinking that yogurt lid licking was your thing.

Leah: It's not at all.

Nick: At all. I mean, definitively no. Hard no.

Leah: Definitively no.

Nick: No exceptions. Not a thing Leah Bonnema does. And I don't want people having the wrong idea about you.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: So I'm glad we could correct that. [laughs]

Leah: I just like to give all the information.

Nick: No, we appreciate that. For paint, I assume you don't lick paint lids either.

Leah: I was gonna say I'm not licking paint lids either.

Nick: [laughs] So long story short, I think calling was fine. And yeah, I feel like it's just sort of an unfortunate customer service experience, but one that's not super unusual. But I think this was handled fine.

Leah: And it wasn't you. It was just weird that they added that. I honestly think it could have been to get the other person to move faster.

Nick: Yeah, I think it was a mobilization technique.

Leah: But you seem lovely. I think it was an out of the box thinking idea.

Nick: Yeah. And I wonder what paint color we were going for?

Leah: I imagine it's some sort of a beautiful blue.

Nick: Okay. If it were me, it would probably be gray or off gray or dark gray.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: Plummet. Blackened. Yeah. Something—something in the Farrow & Ball world.

Leah: Edgar Allan Poe?

Nick: Oh, that's too dark.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: So our next question is quote, "Do some people not understand that working from home is actually working? I'm lucky to live close to my childhood best friend who has a one-year-old baby. We both want to see each other often, ideally at least once a week. I'm totally fine with being flexible and going over to her place more often, since she has all her baby stuff there and we can more easily hang out, but on the occasions when I invite her to my place, she constantly proposes a time in the middle of the workday. Proposing another time has always worked, but I find this habit of hers rude. The implication seems to be that she assumes I'm not working because I'm home. Should I say something?"

Leah: I have multiple levels of feelings about this question.

Nick: Oh, okay. I don't. So let's start with your first level. [laughs]

Leah: Well, it's just multiple levels because I think the way people come across and people's intentions are not the same.

Nick: Fair enough. Yes. I mean, my first thought was I don't think this is the hill you want to die on.

Leah: Well, I think you could say something like, "Middle of the days don't work for me because it's right in the middle of the workday."

Nick: Right.

Leah: And just say it like as a not this time out, in general.

Nick: Right. Yes. "Unfortunately, during the day it's hard for me to sneak away from work, but always happy to get together after 6:00 pm."

Leah: Yeah, I think we just do a blanket statement on that. But I do think do some people not understand working from home is actually working?

Nick: Oh, yes. For sure. Yes.

Leah: And I think that anybody who doesn't have a job that's at a separate location, that's regular hours nine to five has experienced this.

Nick: Oh yeah. Absolutely.

Leah: I've spent most of the past decade with people not understanding that doing comedy is actually work.

Nick: [laughs] Yeah. Yeah, it's effort. It is a thing that does require skill and attention.

Leah: Or if I'm at home—yeah, I'm at home writing, like, it's actually—like it's a job. And so I really understand this, but I don't think that people are poorly intentioned, it's just how they have always thought of what regular jobs are. And so you just have to be like, "No, I'm working. I could do this later."

Nick: But I will say, like, there are people who work from home who actually do enjoy a break in the day. Like, oh, I'm sort of, like, trapped in my house all day long. It would be nice to have an excuse to, like, just get out of the house for a few hours. And so, you know, maybe you feel like that sometimes, and wouldn't it be nice to maybe then just, like, hang out with your friend? So I feel like, do you want to close the door permanently on a daytime sort of get together? Maybe not. Like, you know, maybe it's nice to be asked, and it seems like this friend is fine with you saying no, so it's just they asked and answered kind of thing. And, like, "Yeah, I'm not free today because I'm working all day, but maybe next week, like, oh, a two o'clock coffee? That actually might be a nice escape."

Leah: I don't think our letter-writer thinks that. I think our letter-writer is like, "Hey, these are my days. This is my set schedule. I'm home and I'm working."

Nick: Fair enough.

Leah: But also, yes, I do think that people think that alternative ways of working is not the same as working, and that can be annoying.

Nick: Yeah, and there's not much you can do about that other than, like, I think most people don't necessarily work, like, traditional hours.

Leah: Not anymore.

Nick: Like, I feel like the people I know—like, the number of people I know who, like, go to an office five days a week and work nine to five? Like, I don't know—I would have to think really hard about, like, who do I know who does that?

Leah: Well, it's like—we've had a question before where people—somebody assumes that if you're home, you're available.

Nick: Right. Yeah. Oh, isn't that far from the truth?

Leah: And you're like, "No, I'm working here."

Nick: Or "I'm not working here, but I'm not available for you." [laughs]

Leah: Yeah. I'm also not available.

Nick: Yeah, definitely. I could be not working and I could be home and I'm still not available. Yeah.

Leah: So just think about other people's work schedules when you ask them questions.

Nick: Thinking about other people. How weird!

Leah: Have we brought that up? I don't know.

Nick: I think we should. That's a good one. We should think about that more. Maybe we should mention that. Maybe that's like a thing we could talk about next time. I feel like that's relevant.

Leah: Maybe throw that on the whiteboard.

Nick: [laughs] Let's put—let's put "thinking of other people" on the whiteboard. Yeah.

Leah: Put a pin in that!

Nick: [laughs] So our next question is quote, "My friend recently moved to a house on her new flower farm, and invited me to a housewarming party. She let me know that she'd be holding a bouquet-making class during part of the party, and that she would be charging for it since flowers are expensive to grow and her business hasn't gotten off the ground yet. She asked me to RSVP to both the party and the class. I RSVPed yes to the party, but no to the class since I was already buying a housewarming gift and it wasn't in my budget to afford both that and the class. During the party, she announced the bouquet-making class was starting, and then asked if I would change my mind and join. I declined, and she said that she didn't want me to miss out and would I please reconsider? I explained that it just wasn't in my budget. She said she understood but seemed unhappy. Only a few of us guests at the party didn't join the class, and now I'm wondering if we all committed a faux pas. Should I have declined to attend the party if I wasn't going to join the class?"

Leah: I'm gonna say that's on your friend.

Nick: Yeah. I don't think you did anything wrong here. You were put in a very weird position.

Leah: Very weird.

Nick: Because, like, this was a social event blended with a business event. And that line between the two, I guess, was sort of very distinct, but then you were just made to feel guilty.

Leah: When I read this, I heard Nick's voice in my head going, "Oh, I don't like that at all."

Nick: I don't care for this. Yeah. No, I don't like any of this. [laughs] Yeah, because it's like you're trying to guilt me into giving you money. That's kind of what that is.

Leah: That's exactly what that is.

Nick: And it's sort of like, if I wanted to support your business, I would attend to do that. But, like, I didn't want to spend money on a gift, which I think I would have had to do for the housewarming. Like, could I have come to your housewarming and not bring a gift and then take your class? I don't know, but it's like, I don't even want to be faced with that decision.

Leah: I think it's very odd that your friend set it up this way.

Nick: It's a weird construction. Yeah.

Leah: And then you had done the RSVP correctly. You said, "I can go to this, I can't go to this." And then—which is appropriate. And then you showed up with a gift, which is lovely. And then when you went to leave, they then, as Nick said, made you feel bad, which I just feel I don't like.

Nick: Yeah. And I think a lot of the other friends were willing to do both, and I think that's fine. But that's also their call if they wanted to do that. But I think the host erred in trying to squeeze a commercial activity into this social activity. I feel like shoehorning that I think was never gonna really work out smoothly.

Leah: I also—and this may be another for-the-whiteboard topic—it's people's incomes, what people can spend every month, everybody's budgets, it varies. And, like, that's your budget, that's your budget. And then there's no more discussion on that.

Nick: Yeah. For a host to be like, "Oh no, really, you know, do it even though you said no but, like, do it anyway," yeah, that's—I don't love that. I mean, the way to have handled this would have been to do a free demo. Like, if you can't afford to give everybody bouquets of flowers, and I get that, I guess flowers are expensive, you're getting your business off the ground. But if you wanted to sort of give an example of, like, oh, what you can do then, like, was there a way where everybody at the party could participate and then not charge them? Like, "Oh, I'm gonna just make one bouquet in front of you all showing you what it is." And, like, that would have been a solution, I think, which is like I feel like, could we have done that? I feel like we could have done that.

Leah: Because I think otherwise it's two separate events. It's a housewarming, and then buy-the-flowers-and-I'll-show-you-how-to-make-bouquets event.

Nick: Right. Yeah. But the two together. Yeah, this just wasn't successful.

Leah: And I don't like that our letter-writer, who is clearly lovely, feels bad. This was not you.

Nick: Yeah, this wasn't you. Yeah. And also, what were you supposed to do differently? Like, the first option is, like, do both. The second option is, like, not attend at all, which I guess maybe would have been the best option because it sounds like the host really didn't want you to choose one or the other. Like, that wasn't a sincere choice.

Leah: But I don't think that's on our letter-writer.

Nick: Oh, it's not on our letter writer to try and read between the lines. Like, I was invited to two things. I chose to attend one of the two things. As a guest, I fulfilled my obligations. If a host did not intend for me to choose between these things, then the host should not have given me the choice.

Leah: Absolutely.

Nick: Right. But I feel like the host secretly didn't want you to choose one or the other, and so there was some insincerity with that.

Leah: And also of the host, it's like, do you want to see your friends or do you want them all to say no because they can't afford your thing?

Nick: Or if it was really important for this person to attend this class and you were at the party and you didn't want them to feel left out, then you would just be like, "Oh, just join the class anyway. You don't have to pay for it."

Leah: Yeah, and just say it quietly in the other room.

Nick: But it sounds like that wasn't what was important here. It was "I want your money."

Leah: She's just rude. I—I do find—and I say this all the time—it's always when somebody else is being rude that then the person who's not being rude and has done everything right is like, "Did I do something wrong?"

Nick: Yeah, we need a word for this. This sort of ...

Leah: We do need a word.

Nick: Boomerang, reflective, coefficient angle. There's some ...

Leah: There is something.

Nick: ... physics term. There's some property of nature. There's some reflective something. Yeah, it's on the tip of my tongue. I can't quite—it's there though. We need to come up with a word for when people who do bad etiquette things make the person who is the victim of that etiquette crime feel like they were the cause.

Leah: Yes, yes!

Nick: So whatever that is. Yes. So listeners, if you have some words to describe this property, we need to put a name to this.

Leah: I really want a name for that, because I also feel this is the same kind of a similar feeling when you end up feeling like, oh, I just feel guilty about this interaction that's just happened. And then you realize, oh no, actually, I feel angry this person did this.

Nick: [laughs] Right. Yeah.

Leah: But somehow the—the matrix of how they flew that energy back at me and then you're like, "Oh wait, what just happened here?"

Nick: Yeah. No, there is something very clever about people who are good at that. Yeah, it is a skill. It is a skill to just deflect all etiquette guilt back.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: Yeah, it's—I guess it's sort of like a concave dish. Is that what it is?

Leah: Yeah. I'm sort of seeing it as like a, you know, in those superhero movies where people sort of take that energy and then they magnify it and send it back to you?

Nick: Yeah. All right, so we need a word, listeners. Send us your words or your concepts. Whatever this is, gotta put a name to this, because I think once we name it then it'll be easier to identify. And once we identify it more easily then we can end it.

Leah: Yeah. I a hundred percent agree. I'm looking forward to these.

Nick: Very much so. So our next thing is an etiquette crime report.

Leah: Bay-oh, bay-oh, bay-oh! What do you think of that one?

Nick: I mean, not bad. I like that. Yeah. Yeah listeners, we are still trying to find the right sound effect. Leah has declined "wiener, wiener, wiener," which is my preference, but we're gonna come up with something great.

Leah: Well, also, if you want to do it, you're welcome to do it.

Nick: No, no. No, I would never take this away from you.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: So the report is as follows. Quote, "I received a written invitation from a neighbor to a dinner party at her home. As my husband was not included on the invitation, I called her to make sure that this was not a mistake. No, he wasn't invited. As I've hosted ladies-only tea parties, I assumed this was another ladies-only event. However, when I arrived, it turned out that the dinner guests included a single woman, myself, and two married couples, plus the hostess and her husband—eight people total—all of whom knew me and my husband. Both of the couples asked me why my husband did not come. Was he sick? They were surprised when I told them that he had not been invited for some reason. I was mortified, and as I was leaving after the dinner, I asked the hostess why my husband had not been invited. Her reply? 'Oh, we only have eight dining room chairs.' I was speechless."

Leah: What?

Nick: [laughs] I mean, okay, you have eight chairs. And so this is how we handle that. So rude!

Leah: It's so—I can't.

Nick: Yeah. The only thing I wrote down was "Rude" period.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: [laughs] I mean, yes—I mean it's so—it's so rude. I mean it's so rude.

Leah: It's so rude!

Nick: And this is the excuse? I don't—this is—this is not a good excuse. No.

Leah: Yeah, you only have eight chairs, and if that's really what you want to stick with, that you only have eight chairs, and you can't—you can't add a chair, then I would be like, "Then why did you invite the single person, and why didn't you just invite us as a couple?"

Nick: Yeah, I mean that's—couples get invited. They're a unit. They're a pair. You don't separate them unless you have a really good reason, and not being able to go to Ikea and getting a folding chair is not one of them.

Leah: I don't think I would ever talk to this person again.

Nick: I would definitely file this away and note this about this person, and I would have trouble extending future invitations.

Leah: But I would have more than trouble. I just would—I wouldn't.

Nick: Yeah. I mean, it's pretty rude. I mean, I guess I wonder, like, is that really the reason? Like, do we think that's actually—is that really the reason? That can't actually be the reason.

Leah: It's just so odd.

Nick: There must be some other reason why we don't want to invite the husband because, like, this can't be it.

Leah: But then just don't invite the—their partner.

Nick: That would have been the polite way to handle it. Right. "I don't have room for both of you, and so—" right. But to use a chair excuse? I've never heard this as an excuse before. I mean, this is a great excuse. "I'm sorry. I just don't have the furniture."

Leah: Just don't invite the whole couple.

Nick: Yeah, that—that is what you would do or, you know, you—yeah, I mean, it's—there were so many other ways to handle this. This was not it, though.

Leah: This was most certainly not it.

Nick: So thank you for submitting this etiquette crime report. And as a reminder, if you have been the victim or a witness to an etiquette crime, EtiquetteCrime.com. It's a great place to submit it. We will—we can't really do much investigation, but we will certainly ...

Leah: Although I just thought of something we could do.

Nick: Oh?

Leah: We could send these people a chair.

Nick: Um, I—I actually do have some folding chairs in storage. I could put a shipping label on that.

Leah: We could just send them. "Hey, it's Nick and Leah from Were You Raised By Wolves? We heard that you had a chair shortage problem."

Nick: Yeah!

Leah: "This should help you out in the future."

Nick: Oh! Okay, listener, if you want to send me the address of this person, I will send a chair. I will absolutely send a chair. I'm not joking. I will go online. I will buy a chair online. I will have it shipped directly to them with a gift note. Is that petty? Is that rude? It might be, but I'm kind of in that mood right now.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: So I'm willing to commit an etiquette crime to right another etiquette crime, sure. I feel like—is that wrong?

Leah: Nick has your back. Nick has your back.

Nick: Is that wrong? I don't know. I feel—it feels so right, though.

Leah: It feels—does feel right. It also feels like we might be embarking on a whole new journey.

Nick: Yes, it's—well, it's etiquette justice.

Leah: [laughs] It is etiquette justice.

Nick: You know, sometimes, like Robin Hood, you know, stealing from the rich to give to the poor, that is technically wrong. But, you know, so maybe sending chairs is in that spirit.

Leah: I mean, I love it!

Nick: Okay. Well, we're gonna put this on the whiteboard. I have to decide whether or not this is legal, but ...

Leah: It may not be legal. We are gonna have to really think about it.

Nick: We're gonna loop in legal. We're gonna get the legal department involved.

Leah: By legal we mean ...

Nick: We'll Google it.

Leah: [laughs]

Nick: So please send us your etiquette crime reports. And we'll of course take your questions, your vents, your repents, everything. So go to our website, WereYouRaisedByWolves.com. Or you can leave us a voicemail or send us a text message: (267) CALL-RBW. And we'll see you next time!

Leah: Bye!

Nick: Bye!